Posts from — December 2011

“I know where I am going, because I know where I have been…..Nothing about my life has been easy. But nothing is going to keep me down, because I know a lot more today than I knew yesterday. So I am ready to carry on.”
Mary J. Blige -Lyrics for A Living Proof 

This is will be my last blog post for 2011. I never knew how much I would have enjoyed the writing process when I started MI CAN BE back in August of this year. It took me a minute to find my footing, but with every entry my writing has evolved. I have been tempted to delete a few of the earlier entires, because I didn’t feel like they were well written. But doing so would have defeat the whole purpose of this blog, which is to encourage others to embrace and learn from their failures while growing from it. Should you have the time to check out the genesis of this site click here.

We all have a story, our stories might not be hollywood blockbusters, but our stories have all the trappings of one. Some of our stories are reeling with suspense, horror, drama, romance, and comedy. Not everyone is willing to share their personal story with the world, as it infringes on their privacy. However, I believe some stories that we hold back from others out of the fear of being judged need to be told, in order to strengthen and encourage someone going through a personal hell.

I have chosen to share my story; one of defeat, failures, disappointments, set back, lost love, and bouncing back.  I desire to shed light on the path of those walking beside and behind me.  The year 2o11 has been a really trying one. Many times I felt like giving up. I felt like I was stuck in a cyclone, and as a result of thinking so I was indeed stuck. I had to learn how to adjust to some major changes, in the process I realized how spoiled I was. I resisted for as long I could, until I had no other choice but to surrender to the experience.  I was humbled. Now I am grateful.

2011 might also have been challenging for you, but the fact that you made it to the end of the year makes you a winner!  You know a lot more today than you did yesterday. You are much older and wiser now, so keep pressing on.  Don’t worry about what you can’t see, in time, all things will be revealed. Focus on where you are going and stop looking behind. As painful as your experiences might have been, they are over. I practice living in the moment, so that I won’t be  haunted by the memories of the past. Can’t say it has always been easy, but I keep reminding myself that my best days are in front of me.

The world is moving at such a fast pace, making it really easy for us to lose sense of what is important. As we embark upon 2012, not only make plans to fulfill your material and financial desires, but also give yourself permission to grow into the powerful person you were meant to be free. Return to sender all the baggages of self-defeat, failure, anger, loneliness, frustration, resentment, self pity  and everything else that have been holding you back from living your best life.

I wish for you peace, happiness, prosperity and abundance in all that you do.

See you in 2012!

Kymarie

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“Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”
John 14:27

When you are afraid of anything you are acknowledging its power to hurt you. Fear is just an illusion, but if left unchecked, it has the power to paralyze. Another human can not take your fear away. To eliminate fear from your life, you have to take ownership of the conditions that have brought about your feelings of fear.

Fear is the opposite of faith. When we abide in perfect love, we cast out fear. We attract to us the things we think about most. Change your fear based thoughts into faith based ones. As children of God, we are reminded to walk by faith and not by sight and that without faith it is impossible to please the One who created us out of His abundant grace.

Why do we continue to perpetuate the cycle of fear, when we have all been given the spirit of power, love and a sound mind?

We forgot who we are, and who we were meant to be. By stepping into the darkness we have become children of competition, covetousness and scarcity. We perceive others as being better than us, not remembering that the power within them, also abides in us– we are all one.

Until today, you might have considered selling out your birthright of abundance, power and greatness for a morsel of meal. Your desperation have forced you to abandon the truth of who you are. Just for today, acknowledge the light within you and surrender all of your expectations. Accept the fact that you don’t have all of the answers, and commit to seeking the truth. You are more than what you do, where you live or the car you drive. You are special, and your being here truly matters, even if you have not yet realized that truth.

Positive Affirmation: Today, I choose to allow faith to be my guide. I surrender all, and I am no longer a prisoner of fear. I AM FREE.

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“Awaken to the truth that you have the power to take what appears to be bad and turn it around for your good.”
Kymarie McEwan

The moment I realized that it was my own thinking process holding me back from living out my true potential I became liberated!

If what you are currently thinking, doesn’t make you feel good about yourself or the situation you find yourself in, change it. If the feelings produced by your negative and toxic mindset makes you feel defeated and helpless, work on changing those feeling. If what you are currently doing, not working for you, change your actions by taking responsibility for your life.

You have heard this saying before,” you don’t have control over what happens outside of you however, you have the power to control your attitude about what is happening.” I sat in the gutters of self-pitty and victimization for a very long time. I was confronted with situations I thought had no control over and my mind kept telling me I was stuck. I led myself to believe, that in order for me to elevate myself out of my condition, the situation had to change first. I was powerless,because I had allowed my divine power to work against me through negative thinking and feelings.

Imagine the great power we hold on the inside. If we use our power in a negative way, we self-distruct,  and conversely if we harness the power positively, we manifest greatness. It is never the other person or situation that defeat us. We defeat our very selves. When our experiences trigger negative feelings and thoughts, we have the right to say NO, I don’t want that for myself! I refuse to be angry! I refuse to harbor un-forgiveness! I refuse to hold on to the past! I refuse to be negative!  Talking to yourself can be one of the most liberating experiences.

Until today you might have allowed yourself to believe that you were powerless to change your thoughts and feelings. I am here to remind you however, that all things will work together for your good. Allow your bad days to teach you, but never allow those bad days to define you. God created each of us with infinite possibilities.  The day we choose to surrender our negativity, is the day we begin to live a truly abundant life.

Positive Affirmation: Today I surrender all my toxic thoughts and feels that I have been carrying around. Today I choose to awaken to the power within me. I surrender all thoughts of tomorrow and choose to live fully today. I believe the best is still yet to come so I shall wait patiently.

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“Choose to abide in perfect peace by letting go of all thoughts that will seek to rob you of it.”
Kymarie McEwan

You might have woken up this morning and the first thing to greet you were the chattering voices in your head all vying for your attention. There are many deadlines to meet, and your thoughts are giving you the illusions that everything must to be done now!

Your day haven’t even fully started, and already you are experiencing a melt down. Your feelings of anxiety, fear, stress, inadequacies, insecurities and desperation are all a by-product of not being able to stop the chatter taking place in your head.

When you find yourself confronted with the consistent, unproductive mental chatter, the best thing you can do for your sanity is to STOP whatever you are doing in that moment and become aware of what is taking place. Identify the thoughts and acknowledge them. Resist the urge to beat upon yourself for not being in control and be still.

All that needs to be done,must be done in peace and harmony. Make a mental list of all task and prioritize. Eliminate those activities from the list that need to be completed another day and focus on only what needs your attention today. You don’t have to be a super hero, accept help from others and delegate some of your duties if you can. Once you have done all that is humanly possible, allow the peace of God to guide you every step of the way, just for today.

Positive Affirmation: I will allow peace to be my guide. I give myself permission to only do those things that are required of me today.

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“For I know the plans I have for you,’ says the Lord, ‘plans for well-being and not for trouble, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11 (NLV)

I recently watched an amazing movie, Soul Surfer which is based on the real life experience ofBethany Hamilton, who lost her left arm at the age of 13  in a shark attach while surfing off Kauai’s North Shore. Bethany lost over 60% of her blood, and had to undergo several surgeries. Life guards and doctors believe that it was Bethany’s faith in God and water sense which helped her through the traumatic event. However, what I found even more remarkable, is that only one month after her attach Bethany was back in the water pursing her goal to be a professional surfer!

In January of 2004, Bethany made her return to surf competition; placing 5th in the Open Women’s division of that contest. With no intention of stopping, Bethany continued to enter and excel in competition. Just over a year after the attack she took 1st place in the Explorer Women’s division of the 2005 NSSA National Championships – winning her first National Title.

In 2007, even with her disability, Bethany realized her dream and turned pro!

Many of us have given up on our dreams and aspirations, because of the seemly insurmountable obstacles standing in our way. Unlike Bethany, the only disability we have is the one that exist in our thoughts.

It is easy for us to get inspired for a moment by the awesomeness of someone else’s story, but we doubt that we too are able to write an equally awe-inspiring story of our own. I could whisper in your ears all day long that you have greatness within, but unless you believe that statement to be true for you, my words will mean nothing. You have to push beyond your fears and BELIEVE. I HAVE GREATNESS WITHIN!

Your destiny is wrapped up in your life experiences. Everyday you must be resolute and determined  to peal away another layer of  fear and unbelief. You have to know that your being here on earth at this time matters.  Don’t allow your past mistakes to define your future. Your destiny is greater than your mistakes.

What am I saying? Our mistakes, failures, and poor choices should not be a used to cripple us and keep us from our divine destiny. It is not about how you start life, it’s how you finish.

Whenever you are tempted to give up, remember the story of Bethany Hamilton, the girl with one arm who became a surfing pro.

Positive Affirmation: My will to succeed is stronger than my disability. I will not quit. I will not quit.

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“Life is a gift from God and it offers us the privilege, opportunity and responsibility to give something back, by becoming more.”
Anthony Robins

One of the advantages of being born in the last month of the year is that I am given the opportunity to reflect upon the previous 11 months. I don’t allow myself to get caught up with the gifts and festivity of the day. In fact what appeals to me the most, is figuring out how much I have grown as a person from one birthday to the next.

When I was 10 years old, I thought the world would have ended in the year 2000. At that early age, I was of the opinion that I didn’t have much time to live and all that needed to be accomplished needed to be done before I was 24. The irony of the whole thing is that instead of the world ending, I was bringing forth a new life in the new millennium. I had accomplished all that I desired and them some, but in the process I forgot to truly live.

With age, we all should gain more wisdom. What appealed to me in my 20′s no longer stimulates me in my 30′s. I now realize that a life centered around ”things” is no life to be lived at all. All that has taken a life time to gain can be taken away in an instant. The simplicity of life is more valuable than the complexity and weight of material possessions.

I don’t know how much longer I will be here. Like the date on a can of food, we too have an expiration date.

As I ponder my legacy, I want to be remembered for the woman I became. Your life, my life is a gift, and I want to share the experiences of my life in hopes of helping someone else’s be better. I don’t want to hide behind my failures, in fact I want my failures to guide someone else into their success.

Man have been appointed to live 3 scores and 10(70) years, anything over that is a blessing. I desire to abide in the arms of gratitude and pledge to spend more time valuing what I have now, and spend less time focusing and complaining on what I don’t have. I will live more, do more good and become more of the person God intended for me to be.

What about you? What do you plan to do with your gift of life?

Positive Affirmation: I am willing to be all that God wants me to be. I will value my life and my contribution more than I do things.

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“Every single day, strive to be better than you were the day before. Only those with a mediocre mindset are every satisfied with yesterday’s result.”
Kymarie McEwan 

 Are you paying attention to what your life is telling you? Or are you going around in circles like a hamster on a wheel to nowhere?

I love to write, but I am not the greatest when it comes on to sentence construction and spelling. Can I tell you how grateful I am for the invention of spell check. Sometimes not even spell check understand what it is that I am trying to spell . I write from my heart, but sentiments will never substitute for good writing. Many times during the writing process, I would often get stuck wondering if I was using the correct subject/predicate forms. However, these days I don’t allow my weaknesses get in the way of doing what I love. I keeping pushing forward toward the expected goal. With that being said, because I have identified a weakness, I challenge myself to improve upon it daily.I just refuse to be defeated by focusing more upon my weaknesses than upon my strengths.

Stop right here. Take out a sheet of paper and write in big bold letters:

WHAT AM I GOOD AT?

List them all. Your strengths don’t have to be based on a particular vocation. If you can tie your shoe laces without tripping over them list that ( I know, I know that’s a little off the top, but you get the point:). List every single thing you are good at.

Once you are done listing your strengths, take out another sheet of paper and write:

IN WHAT AREAS OF MY LIFE  DO I NEED IMPROVEMENT?

Be bold enough to list everything without filtering. If we are not conscious of the areas that needs improvement, how can we expect to be better than the day before? It just is not possible.

Case in point, I have a problem with being consistent. I will have a really great idea, start and stop mid-stream when I become discouraged due to things not moving as fast as I want them to. But I am learning, and I realize that I will never get to where I want without being consistent, persistent and resolved. I have to be willing to do the things I must, even if I can’t see immediate results.

I love to write, but I dread the writing process because of the little weakness I mentioned above:) So I had to come up with a plan to keep me on task. I broke down the process into smaller manageable tasks and give myself a day to just sit with the quotes that inspire me before I begin to write. I have been doing this for a little while now and I have to say writing is now becoming fun. I push myself to write even when I don’t feel like writing. I challenge myself to write better materials than what I wrote the day before. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t, but I just keep on writing. To even improve upon my writing skills, I now make time to read writing blogs and read more. Why do I keep doing this, I want to be better. I want to grow each and every day. I want to realize my full potential, by constantly pushing myself outside of my comfort zone.

Never settle  and think that you already know all that that you need to know. There is always more to discover and learn. Challenge yourself to learn event those things that has no particular use to you right now. You might be sunrise how that knowledge could serve you in the future. Be a consummate student. Everyday you mantra should be I must be better than I was yesterday. Learn from the things you go through daily. Learn from your failures and learn from others success. Never stop learning until the day you die. You owe it to yourself.

Positive Affirmation: Today, I will find the time to learn about something I did not know before. I will continue to learn about my craft and practice until I am better. I will also challenge myself to learn something new about the people in my life.

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