What should Christmas feel like? Whatever it is, I’m not feeling it. It’s not that I’m lonely or depressed. And it’s not the pain in my knee and hip from that brutal fall I took in the driveway about a week ago. And it’s certainly not the sunshine outside my window.
Sleigh bells may be ringing up north but not here in Lakeland, Florida. No bells can be heard. There’s no sound at all, not even the whisper of the wind or the roar of traffic from the interstate. Silence prevails.
Surely people are driving hither and thither, buying Christmas presents and doing all the things they do at this time of year. And there’s a busy road just 200 yards from my driveway. But I hear nothing.
Perhaps if I were up and about, ambling through Publix supermarket, serenaded by Christmas carols, I would feel the spirit of the season stirring. But I am sidelined with this knee of mine. Sandra is doing the shopping – and everything else . I bet she doesn’t feel much like Christmas, either. She’s way too busy taking care of my chores as well as hers. I imagine she’s too stressed to feel much of anything (other than exhaustion).
I doubt we will be able to put up a Christmas tree this year, or do the usual things we do with me laid up like this and only a few days to go. It’s like the sound of one hand clapping – although I must admit it’s the more capable hand that’s still functional.
Am I feeling sorry for myself? Not really. I’m not feeling much of anything, – except the pain in that wretched knee. Dr. Min, my primary care physician (he’s from Burma), suspects a broken bone in the knee joint but he hasn’t seen the X-rays yet. He’s supposed to phone and let me know. And then what?
How do you mend a broken knee? I bet it’s tricky.
But I won’t cross that bridge prematurely. I’ll wait and see.
And listen to the silence.