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Poem: Reflecting On the Dream

Written by empressjournee
Photo Credit:  Lorena Preda  

There was a time, when I was a child,
I look through the outside of my window,
as I watch different ethnic skin tone children,
playing—happily: when I felt lonely, scared,
when I felt void, when I felt I had no father's
presence, in my home, to guide me rightly, 
no one I felt, that cares for me: 
I created thoughts, that one day, 
I will have a playmate like them
that was kind, loving, compassionate,
that sees me, the soul, and our friendship
was not a demand, a command, but embraces my flaws
And know it’s okay to just be me:
Then when I grew up each day, I began to see,
the genius of the minds, how complex, different, 
the world, life, could be: how so many things
I needed to know, to grow, to succeed,
that there were things, set in place,
to let me know, there were boundaries,
that the beautiful and great dream,
I seek, was vast, larger, somewhat
intense, calm, like the ocean, very deep:

There was a time, I found women who appear
so brilliant, beautiful, royal, carefree, fierce, 
wise, exciting, and colorful, that I admired, 
wish to be amongst, although I could not see, 
their hearts, and the minds of these ladies
I saw their friends and their friends, was not me:

There were, also a time, I found men, 
so handsome, mighty, strong, and I wish, 
at least, one would notice me,
but that was the little girl inside of me
missing her father--missing her true daddy
looking out to those who may not be
compassionate, respectful, healthy
kind; 'to wisdom the little girl speak:
but I never thought about the danger 
of loving, a soul, who was there to conquer 
with motive that I disagree:
that may hurt the sacred part of me, 
that their presence may bring joy, shame
or frighten, or humble me: may give insights, 
life lessons, that may take me further,
create more trauma to the mind,
to know life at times can be 'surreal,'
that at times, will make me dream or weep:
will make me look at my self-reflection, 
that had me, questioning, ‘why am I here, 
questioning, my own sanity: like, 
'Does my needs, have a divine purpose, 
to uplift humanity, raise the bar level 
of my own dreams?" "Am I, strong enough 
like the women I see?" to free us all, 
from chains that sabotage our progress, 
and leave us with a victim mentality, 
to keep each one of us in captivity?" 

‘Does my needs help me to clothe the 
soul-mind, in regal brilliancy?' 
rise above, the selfish motives and hypocrisy:
‘Does my needs, change those things I feel within, 
that disturb the mind, that may have hindered 
my love ones and I, progress, to reach a place 
of great jubilee? "that is far greater, 
than the reflection, that is standing 
in front of me, amongst the many shades 
of colors, that wish the best for us all, 
that has paved the way, surely for me: 

I stand in the mirror, commanding myself,
to dream the impossibilities, for those
who needed hope, for those who gave us hope
that we can succeed; I reflect on, the motto, 
that holds the creed, 'Out of Many One people,'
and the proverb, 'I Have A Dream,' 
I still believe!'

© 2023 Empress Journee

 

 

About the author

empressjournee

I am a graduate of Medgar Evers College (M.E.C.); mother of three, grandmother and great grand. I love to read great books and listen to podcasts that uplift my consciousness; sharing historical view of the different shades of color, the various culture, the way we all are connected, the musical genius throughout the world and the works that are done to help us tap into ourselves and know that we are worthy. I also love to write poetry and sing. There was a moment that now phase in another aspiration of my life, I felt singing was a forum—a path to take, that helps to voice, express my thoughts, in time where I was struggling, battling something I did not understand and what I was going through; feeling unsupportive. Although, there was some support, especially from my love ones, the challenges I faced was mostly internal.
I am so grateful for the grace I have been given to be able to write my poetic thoughts, that is my freedom. I was a part of a journey that taught me lessons and motivate me that preparation is a must to face a world that may not be ready for a new rising star. Thank you for taking the time to read my poetry. I especially wanted to give honor to my mother who is no longer in the physical, as well as my natural father for the knowledge of health before he departed from this planet. Also, I would like to thank you my supporter for being on this journey with me even at times when the journey seems unclear. May we appreciate the blessings that has been given to us, as we continue to soar, as we reach a place of true jubilee.
Empress Journee