Has it been nine years, Rachel? Nine years??? Even taking weekends and nights-off into account, that has to be more than 2,000 shows. And I don’t think I’ve missed a week’s worth. Yes, I confess. I’m a fan.
Sandra grumbles about that thing you do with the papers, shuffling them as if they contain notes you need to read. Everybody knows you don’t need notes. You probably don’t even need your teleprompter.
But I don’t mind. Shuffle papers all you want. Make faces. Wave your arms. If that’s what gets you off, I’m OK with it.
So what if you seem to wear the same outfit every night? So what if you don’t show off your legs like those other female anchors? And so what if you don’t wear makeup? I know you have legs even if I never see them. And you don’t need makeup. You look just fine without it.
And you’re so much more than a pretty face, anyway!
What you have, Rachel, is brain power. You cut through the BS like Alexander the Great slashing the Gordian Knot. And you’re brave. You don’t cower. You speak truth to power.
Of course you’re number one in cable news. Who would watch Fox or CNN when they can get the real picture from you? Not me. And I have lots of company – as many as 4.1 million other viewers!
So why are you skipping Friday nights all summer long? I don’t want to watch troop movements and hear about faraway wars. I want to watch and hear you.
Come back, Rachel! Come back!
